Screaming Chicken | 406

The Boomer Bunker is recorded live in front of an online audience.

You think your stupid little podcast or your little TV show is gonna change the world?

Like hell it is.

I'm gonna start a podcast that has no focus and it'll take up an inordinate amount of time.

Welcome in to a Friday edition of the Boomer Bunker.

I'm one of your co hosts, John John Jimingo, and alongside me, my sassy partner, it's the Duchess.

Good evening.

Happy Friday.

And in the background, lurking around as he does the Duke of Drops, it's producer Mike.

Side effect is that you will no longer be able to achieve an erection.

I felt to myself.

Well, I don't know if I like this.

I don't know.

I like the fact that you got tinker toys and a rubber band.

You can split that bitch up.

I think.

I think we were talking about blood pressure medication.

It could be.

Yeah.

Because they say, you know, if you take blood pressure medication, a lot of times it'll take the lead out of your pencil, but.

Yeah, I'm still.

Your heart still beats?

Yeah, my heart still beats, but I'm still.

Oh, man.

I can still.

I can.

I don't even know what to say here.

It still works, that's all.

Okay.

No limp noodles in my.

Yes.

Okay.

All right.

Hey.

There you go.

I'm just gonna let you work that one out.

What did I say?

Oompa Loompa.

What was that?

It says you look a little blue.

You know why?

I don't have my lights on?

I don't have my lights.

Hey, Alexa.

No, no, that doesn't work because I have to turn these on by hand.

Okay.

So yesterday, Duchess could not do the show because she had some personal family stuff to deal with.

And then Monday night, before the show, I had a visitor, and I've had something that's going on.

We might be able to tell you Monday.

I think we might be able to tell you Monday what it was, but we can't now.

It was funny.

My daughter's on her way to San Diego, and the beginning of the show's like, fuck San Diego.

I'm like, well, not.

My baby's there.

Can't do that.

Well, no.

So anyhow, we couldn't do the show last night in general.

Yeah.

And so we decided to do it today, which is kind of cool.

Like this.

Yeah.

You know, to be honest with you, I could do this any day of the week.

I know, because you said to me, why don't you get another co host or do something?

And I'm like, no.

Yeah.

I feel bad because I know your schedule and I didn't realize today was canceled with Brend X. Yeah, well, yeah,.

Yeah, because I had a boo boo.

And look, I.

Good co hosts are hard to find.

So when you have good co hosts and you.

And you have a good repertarian rep. Report.

Rapport.

Yeah, a rapport.

A repapor.

A rappaport.

When you have a repour with a co host, sometimes you just.

It's better just to wait and do the show when they can do it.

That's all.

Cody vouches.

A Rappaport.

A rapport.

Yes.

All right.

So before we get into all the stuff that we don't know what we're gonna get into.

Oh, my goodness.

Budvugger, curse upon you.

He says you can always dig Professor Tom out of the bullpen.

We don't even know where Professor Tom is.

Professor Tom.

You know, we don't even know what street corner he's sleeping on or we have no idea where he's at.

So I'm just saying before we get into everything, I hope he's okay.

I do too.

I hope.

Professor Thomson.

I can tell the care and concern.

I don't wish him any ill will.

It's same on you.

I don't.

Just don't know where he is.

I don't know where he is.

I haven't heard much from him.

Wherever he's landed.

Yeah, wherever he is.

I hope he's doing well.

Oh, my God.

All right, so hold on.

The comments.

I knew it.

Dean says that.

Okay.

Cody says.

I do.

I guess he gives it.

He doesn't give a. Sparky says Tom has a good radio voice.

You think so?

I didn't think that he had a good discussion voice.

Yeah, I agree.

Yeah.

Bob says.

Oh, Bob.

They're dumpster on the left behind Publix.

Okay.

That's where Blood says, hang on.

If you're cold.

He's cold.

Let him in.

Oh, yeah.

I'm sorry.

Just, I. I don't know and it's.

It's fine.

Oh, yeah, he's on Aaron's Discord.

I. I don't know if he still goes Chief of misinformation.

I remember that.

That is true.

I haven't seen him on the Discord, so.

But I've been so busy lately.

I'm barely checking Discord as it is.

Barely answering my text.

What are you talking about?

You didn't text me today at all.

Why should I?

You never answer.

Just kidding.

How you lie.

I don't answer you today.

You did not.

I did not.

Was that yesterday?

I messaged you this morning first, and you replied, okay.

Well, there you go.

Okay.

But don't say, oh, you did message me.

It is.

It's a wound, not a boo boo.

I totally missed that at 4:00'.

Clock.

Ah,.

No, you said, well, we went back and forth.

Oh, here comes the backpedal.

I know.

Look, I own it.

If I didn't.

If I don't message you right away.

Usually I message you before I go to work.

Once I'm at work, things are chaos.

It's hard to answer you.

Here's the deal.

We're adults, all right?

I'm not sitting there waiting to see if I'm on Red.

And then I. I need a certain amount of time.

I text you when you see it and get a chance to send something back.

You send something back.

But there was a time this week when there was a couple days, and I'm like, what are we doing?

I don't know if we're doing a show or not.

And then.

And then I'm sitting there, and all of a sudden I see a thing pop up.

It says, we're not doing a show tonight.

I go, I think she's mad at me because she's not telling me anything, but all of a sudden, the show's canceled.

I found out the show was canceled when you guys found out the show was canceled.

Oh, wow.

I told you.

No, because I talk.

Well, we had discussion my work schedule.

There's another show next week that we're gonna have to work around.

Yes, because people are scheduling things on days that I cannot reschedule.

Right.

Makes me unhappy.

But yeah, I think I.

Well, I know I told you on.

You said you might.

You weren't sure.

I said on Wednesday I wasn't sure.

Right, but.

And then when it was confirmed with me, I told you.

Okay, so.

So all right.

Then you said, can you do the show?

You can do it with somebody else.

I said, no.

Sparky says, duchess answers me on Discord.

Oops.

Maybe I shouldn't have said that.

Yeah, you can say that.

No, I felt bad because I usually.

When we change the schedule, I usually message a couple folks who I know never see anything.

And I did forget to message Sparky.

So.

So when he messaged me about something else, I was like, oh, no.

And I apologized to him, so I still feel bad.

Okay, Sorry.

So in our Discord, which you can get to@boomerbunker.com Discord.

Right.

I did tell Sparky that we were doing the show tonight.

I did see that.

Yeah.

So anyhow, he read it so he can get on Discord.

He did, yes.

All right, Duchess, before we get out, go any further, why don't you tell everybody if they want to communicate with us, how they do that?

All right.

Well, first of all, you can follow us on social media.

You can also leave us a voice message@boomerbunker.com forward slash, voicemail.

You can also send us a text or leave a voice message by calling or texting.

856-477-1935.

And again, if you join our Discord, you can chat with us and all the other bunker dwellers that interact with the show, sometimes on a daily, hourly, minutely basis.

So we would love for you to join us there.

You can find again, all the links@boomerbunker.com and if you'd like to support the show, which John and I would greatly appreciate, hit boomerbunker.com support and throw a few bucks in the kitty.

Yes.

Thank you.

I love cats.

No one tells me nothing.

That's what Arin says.

Well, it's in.

It's in the Discord, you know, and it's also.

Well, Aaron's working now.

So do we.

So how do we get in touch with you, Aaron, if you're working?

Yeah, I know we can.

So.

Yeah.

Well, congratulations being back with the working.

Stuff and the working for the working.

She did that.

I don't know.

Where do you want to go first, Duchess, I will let you drive the show tonight.

What topic would you like to talk about first?

Well, some of these were just crazy stories, and the.

The one that.

The first one we have.

I did borrow this from Razor Wire through the chats, because I just thought it was absolutely hysterical.

We could start with that.

Was there.

It's Friday, so I don't know, do we want to start light and just kind of be a little.

Some humor and then just kind of drift that way, or do we want to do really heavy serious?

When you are a producer of the show, you have to make the tough decisions.

I gave you the reins.

You must.

I'm co producer today.

No, you're producer today.

I'm producer.

Got it.

Okay.

Let's do segment one, and then I'd love to drag it back down to segment four, because I think that one's a lot of fun.

Okay, so since you do the segment one.

Alrighty.

Well, I just want to make sure you were good with it and you were ready.

So this one Made me laugh.

Colombia moves to euthanize Pablo Escobar's cocaine hippos.

So are they hip?

Why are they called cocaine?

Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

Well, they, I believe.

You know, I don't even know why, because it's just.

Were they bought with cocaine money?

Do they give the.

I don't want to see a coke coked up hip.

They are actually so.

Because I grabbed the article and glossed over it, they are the descendants of four animals that Escobar had smuggled into his private estate back in the 80s as part of his personal zoo, as we all have.

Right.

So when he was killed in 93, the hippos escaped, started breeding, and now there's about 170 of them terrorizing villages.

They're n. Wrecking.

Yeah.

They're not friendly.

They're not.

They're.

Yeah, you're welcome.

Bugwigger says they're incest hippos.

Well, I mean, four couples, I think you could probably get away with it.

Maybe, but it depends how they were related to start.

But yeah, and they also, he, I'm sure, bought them with his coke money right there.

So.

Yeah, imported to South America with cocaine money.

So not quite like cocaine bear, where they're under the influence of cocaine, but.

But they were hippos.

Okay.

So officials say if nothing is done, the number could hit 500 by 2030.

And Columbia is putting $2 million towards a mix of euthanasia, sterilization and monitoring.

And animal rights groups are already freaking out about it because.

Just shoot them, you know, Just go.

Out and shoot them.

Put a running at you, huh?

Yeah, I don't know.

Like, I could.

Yeah, I mean, what, again?

They're big and fast.

Faster than they look.

I know.

Listen, I understand they're big, but you just get a bunch of rifles and you go out to where they are and.

And you know, when you see one of them pop up, you just shoot them in the pumpkin and that's it, it's over.

I don't understand why this has to be so hard.

Because we're going to be.

Oh, they're worried about the animal rights.

Here, here.

I'll tell you what.

Animal rights.

I'm amazed Columbia is worried about animal rights.

Yeah, me too.

I'd be like, here, you've got.

I'll give you 90 days.

Go down there and capture them, all, right?

And then get them out of here.

And the ones that you don't get out of here, we're just going to shoot.

Right.

So kind of like how Wild boars are in Texas, in Florida, Arkansas, that just.

They run rampant and they're so dangerous.

First of all, they're just deadly nasty and they terrorize, farm, they destroy things.

And somehow.

I don't know how, you know how your.

Your algorithms pick up interesting things somehow.

One of.

I must have been talking about wild pigs or whatever.

A video came up in my Facebook feed and I'm like, oh, let's watch this.

And it's a company that comes out and traps them and basically they just have like big cages.

They throw a bunch of feed in it and they just, you know, they sit with cameras at like 2 in the morning, these things come out and they're all like sniffing around, huffing, eating all the food.

And then they just drop the cages and so you could get anywhere for.

There was one cage that dropped on a pig, not didn't work out well for him, but they capture like 10, 15 of them and they go apeshit trying to jump out.

And then they just go and pick them off in the morning, which is kind of.

It depends on.

Because some people will go out there and they'll take them and then if they start feeding them, they can actually domesticate them and then they use them for food.

So.

But did you eat those things while pit wild boar?

I don't think they're.

There used to be a show on years ago.

There's this old guy from Texas.

I forget what he was.

And he had a son and a daughter.

Cook anything?

No, Crystal and hunter.

And it was.

They would go out and they would take dogs and they would hunt these wild boar and the dog would catch them and these like the son and the daughter would run up there and tackle these things down and.

And shackle them.

Like they would shackle them up, put their knee.

They would, you know, George Floyd them.

They put their knee on their neck and then they would take.

And put.

Tie their legs together and then they would take them alive.

And then.

Because you could sell them for meat if you had them alive, you shot them.

You can't sell them for meat.

What was that?

Hog wars or something?

Hog wild.

Maybe going hogging.

Boars are edible, but they're nasty.

They taste nasty.

I think those are one of those critters you have to.

You have to put them on like corn and everything to kind of clean them up.

And then after a while you get the wild boar out of them and then you can kill because they're all very musky.

Their meat's really, really musky.

And it's it's terrible.

It's like eating, it's like eating skunk.

That's not a selling point.

No, it's not.

They, they also had another video because of course then I had tons of these videos about, you know, catching wild boar and stuff.

And, and then there's another one where people were picking them off from helicopters.

Like they were flying them and they're just out the windows with like high power, high powered rifles, just automatic like.

Yeah, it was, it was kind of awesome.

But like I felt kind of bad for the pigs because they just, they're just, they don't know.

But it, I mean, clearly they're dangerous and you have to cull it down.

Well, they wreck everything.

They wreck all the.

Well, that's it.

They come in probably like these hippos.

It's just a little smaller scale, but same type of thing.

I understand why, why they're doing it, but it's just kind of awful to just.

Yeah, and they breed like cockroaches.

I mean they have litters like they'll have three litters a year that are.

Eight to 10 of them, like anywhere.

Yeah, there's a lot.

Yeah, they just start.

The matter of fact, now they're all the way up in Canada.

They're having problems.

Went up in Canada.

Now we don't have them here in New Jersey, I don't think.

Not yet, but that, yeah.

So anyhow, that's.

Yeah, I would just shoot them.

Shoot the hippos.

Well, that's it.

So the Colombian officials have authorized a plan to cull up to 80 of the country's roughly 170 cocaine hippos.

Again, the descendants of those particular.

Why not get them all?

Well, I, I don't know why 80s the number.

I think it probably should be more, but it says so in 93 they escaped captivity and been breeding in the wild ever since.

So again, they could hit over 500 in just a few years.

Years.

They're going to, they're going to take and drop the population down to 90 and then they're going to have to do it again.

I don't understand.

Environment Minister Irene Velez says that prior control methods, neutering, relocating animals to zoos have been expensive and ineffective.

Yeah, I don't know why they're not just wiping them out.

It says the government's putting about $2 million towards a program combining chemical and physical euthanasia, continued sterilization and monitoring to identify the most dangerous animals.

They're dangerous.

Some of them are dangerous.

Sure they are.

Don't was your time.

Just.

You know what they should do?

They should.

They should paint DEA on them and just let the cartels take them out.

They would blow the suckers right up, I'm pretty sure.

Oh, here you go.

Cody says let the hippos eat the cartel.

Okay, well, it says the hippos disrupt riverbanks, alter water chemistry.

Ew.

And threaten native species like manatees, otters, and turtles.

And they've also attacked villagers in the Magdalena river region.

But, of course, the animal rights are like.

But it's all about the hippos.

And some Colombian politicians, because, you know, that's.

I guess that's what they're concerned about.

Are pushing back hard, arguing that hippos shouldn't pay the price for mess.

For the mess that a human.

Humans created.

See, that's always the argument, but the humans did it.

Well.

Okay, well, Escobar's dead.

Take out his.

Yeah.

Send.

Send the hippos to meet their buddy Escobar.

In.

In heaven our Lord.

Do all hippos go to heaven?

Just the black ones.

Oh, my God.

I don't.

I'm asking.

I don't know.

Just the black ones.

Yeah.

I don't know.

Okay.

Speaking of which, Budwugger says there's African hippos in Trenton.

They mostly stay near the train station.

I've seen them.

I've seen them.

They're.

They're terrifying.

They're also terrifying.

Yeah.

Especially if you get them between them and their nighttime.

It could be spooky.

There's snacks.

A lot of them are tattooed up and stuff.

You know, they have those hippo teeth, you know, where they're, like, really separated, far apart.

It's.

It's tough.

You see them in Camden, too?

A lot of your urban area hippos.

It's the urban hippos.

The urban hippos, they're as dangerous as your regular wild hippos?

I think they could be.

Yeah.

You ever see them in the mall?

They're not domesticated.

Or a Walmart.

If you see them, if they get into a Walmart, they cause all kinds of damage.

The only way to combat a Trent hippo is a lot of Ganja and McDonald's.

All right.

Okay.

No.

It's so terrible.

This big, fat pig is beautiful.

All right, all right.

Last one I got there.

Cody says some argue the urban hippo is core dangerous as they be carrying.

Yeah, they could be.

That's true.

They could be packing heat, especially in Trenton.

Yes.

Duchess and I were talking the other day, as we do.

We talk yeah.

And we got on the.

I don't even know how we got on the subject of Ron Popeil and all the products he sold in the 80s.

And I said, you know, are they still doing it?

Are they still selling these products?

I gotta be honest with you.

The answer is yes.

The Ronco.

If you go to ronco.com, they still have the products.

But the best part was the commercials.

Oh, well, should we, should we say for people who don't know, huh?

Do you think there's anybody who doesn't know who Ron Popeil is?

Well, what I'm going to do is I'm going to show a couple commercials what he did.

He was just a guy who made all these products and he was.

I think he might have been the inventor of the infomercial.

He, he.

Yeah, he was an American inventor and marketing pioneer known as the king of the infomercial.

See?

Right.

Okay.

So here's some of my favorites.

This One was from 1978.

Let's see if we get this one.

Here we go.

James believes keeping a close watch on his spending helps him resist temptation commercials by tracking spending in the.

Well.

Commercials for commercials.

Yeah.

See,.

Josh, don't get ahead of my jokes.

Here it is.

Here we go.

Hang on.

Where is my.

There we go.

Where's the volume?

There we go.

There's the volume.

Hey, this Christmas party is getting a little too quiet.

I think it's time we liven it up with my favorite Christmas gift, Mr.

Microphone.

Hey, what's that?

Well, you set the dial on your FM radio and testing, testing for the record, these kids are having a fabulous time with Mr.

Microphone, the cordless microphone that actually puts your voice on the radio.

There are no attaching wires, so.

So Mr.

Microphone was a very popular product and it was your first showing all these people enjoying them greatly.

Yeah, it had a little FM transmitter in it that would transmit in a certain frequency and you would turn your FM radio to it and you could use it.

And here's a.

A high stepping black fella.

Black fella.

And he's got his.

With his transistor radio.

Transistor radio and his Mr.

Microphone annoying the neighbors.

Free to move around.

Broadcast over any FM car radio.

Hey, good looking, we'll be back to pick you up later.

You can broadcast at mono or with stereo.

Professional entertainers use Mr.

Microphone for rehearsing.

Could you imagine doing that?

Oh my.

Bring your mister.

First of all, the feedback.

There's one where it showed a bunch of kids singing in.

Wouldn't they all feedback off Each other?

I would think so, yes.

So it'd be like they're screaming jingle bells.

And it'd just be like, how 70.

Look at the 70s haircut, the.

The big wide collar, the giant collars, the feathery like, Denny Terrio hair.

Like, it's just.

Does anybody have an AM FM radio anymore?

Does it.

I mean, anybody?

Do you.

You have one?

Well, it's not mine.

I have it in case of good idea power outages and things like that.

The problem is I have to keep like six giant D cells hanging around in case.

Right.

But.

Yeah, but we have one and you can too.

It's practical and great fun for the whole family.

And for only 1288.

They really make great Christmas Christmas gifts.

The perfect Christmas gift at Walgreens, Woolworth, Wilco, Osco Venture, Webolts, Montgomery Ward.

All the stores out of business.

Yeah, they're all out of one.

What, what, what was the first drugstore?

I think Walgreens.

Walgreens.

Yeah, Walgreens is still here.

All these other stores are so out of business, right?

Like.

Oh, yeah, RIP Woolworth.

Exactly.

Woolworths was cool.

Sparky says that black guy was fresh out of Soul Train.

I love the beginning of Soul Train.

That always made me smile.

Yeah, these products were fantastic.

And I mean, so this was what, 1970 something.

And it was 1288.

Can you.

You know, that's a Christmas gift that like people would buy for kids that you didn't have to live with.

That's something like an aunt and uncle would buy their niece or nephew.

And then they'd be like, see you later.

Yeah, that's the one you would buy your.

The kids to the people you hate.

You give them one of that.

Yeah, those always managed to break or we always ran out of battery, conveniently.

You know, like my mom's like, oh, I gotta buy more batteries.

And then it was just vanish and we'd never see it again.

Touching.

Well, see, the thing about Ron Popeo, what he did was he found a problem and then they made a product to fix it.

He did.

Like this one here.

Pioneer, when you were.

When you had dirty records.

Introducing the amazing Record Vacuum by Ronco.

The new stereo accessory that protects all your records.

Simply insert your record into the record vacuum, turn it on, and your record rotates automatically, sweeping and vacuuming your records, instantly loosening deep, damaging microdust particles.

33 And a third.

45, 78.

Any size fits.

It makes a great Christmas gift.

And it's only 10 8.

I was going to try to stop.

Again, so it's all Christmy.

It's always like.

Cuz.

What.

Why would you.

This is the.

This is the as seen on TV products, right?

Like that you see in Walmart now.

Yes, that's what these are.

They have the shelf.

Yeah, that thing looked like.

Imagine like a knife block, like something like that.

But you put the record in and it just spins it like vertically.

And then it just.

Yeah, I. I've never seen that.

I didn't think that was even such a thing.

Okay.

I always thought it's just the dust collected on the needle.

And then you just had to be like, on the needle and blow it off.

All right.

I don't know if you remember this one.

I had one of these.

I don't know if it was a Ronco one, but I remember having one of these as a kid.

It never worked.

I ended up getting stitches over this stupid thing.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

Here we go.

Ladies and gentlemen.

What was this fine product?

It was.

The Ronco bottle and jar cutter are.

Unwrapping the greatest gift you will ever give to mom, dad, even the kids.

It's the Ronco bottle and jar cutter.

An exciting new way to recycle throwaway bottles and jars into decorative glassware centerpieces.

Thousands of things.

Emery cloth is included to make glasses.

Drinking Smoot, A hobby for dad.

Craft for the kids or Great gift for mom.

The Ronco bottle and jar cutter Craft for kids.

When you didn't have any money, you took your mom's old beer bottle and made her wine glasses.

Would you have bought this for your children?

I did get.

I got that.

I did that for your kids.

No, no.

I was like 12 years old and someone gave me that as a gift.

And I was trying to do it and I ended up slicing my finger and I had to get stitches in my thumb and.

Safe for kids.

Doctor's visits not paid for.

So what you would do, Deductibles not included.

You would take.

And you would score this thing, right?

You would go around it, you would score it, and then you would take a candle and then you would heat it and then put it in water.

And it was supposed to just snap and it would come off that way and the thing exploded in.

I guess I got it too hot.

I put it in.

Exploded.

Or I held it.

Whatever.

Heated that whole thing.

It exploded in my hand and cut my thumb.

And I had to go get like two stitches in my thumb over the stupid thing.

I guarantee you did not read those directions right?

Of course not.

I was.

I was 12.

I know, who needs directions?

Like, I'll just heat it up, really, if.

If I just need to warm it up Here, let me make it really hot to make it so I can do it faster.

All right, let me ask you this.

I don't know how many mothers or fathers would allow a 12 year old to play with that toy.

My mother never would have given us that.

Even if she knew somebody gave it to us, it would vanish in a heartbeat.

Yeah.

Oh, wait, so Sparky has a question for you.

He goes, did your dad yell at you for doing it wrong?

Yes.

Yes.

I gotta take you to the fucking hospital.

He was pissed off because I had to go to the hospital and I.

Had to go to the emergency, like a 20 visit.

Yeah, it was like 35 back then.

He's like, Jesus Christ, what the hell?

I could spend that 35 on two cases of beer.

Well, wasn't a drinker, but he was pissed off that he had to go take me there.

You know, that could have been part of the boat.

Boat fund.

All right, but here's the one that get.

I had one of these.

I think I told Duchess the story earlier.

Absorber Pocket fisherman.

Here it is.

These were so great.

Here's a.

It's the fishing invention of the century.

There's now, if you're listening to this as a podcast, this guy's on a wooden boat and this guy's.

And the fisherman's got the pocket fisherman and they're pulling in like a 15 to 18 pound fish in the back with a big, giant net.

All right, think about that giant ass bass.

Right now, we used to go and take our fishing poles and we would ride to the creek as we did, and we would fish with our fishing poles.

They were a pain in the ass.

And I thought to myself, my God, the pocket fisherman would be amazing.

You know, I could just put it in.

So much easier to ride your bike with it, right?

Ride with it.

Yeah.

And you would be able to do this.

So we got that one.

All right, so hang on, so let me just finish the rest of this now.

Been anything like it, the size of that fish.

He caught that on the pocket.

Fisher.

Mike Ashley caught that pocket fisherman.

Men, women, youngsters, can cast almost like experts.

The very first time, it was another thing.

Almost like if you tried to cast it too far, it would not all up and you might as well throw it in the trash because you couldn't get it unknotted and you couldn't.

It was a. I'm telling you, this thing was the biggest Piece of.

Yeah, that's how I cast.

Like.

Then I forgot to drop the.

Right.

What is it?

The little catch.

And then I was like the real or.

Yeah, what is it called?

The.

What's that little metal.

The bail thing.

The bale.

The bail.

I always forget to do that and it just.

All right, so here we go.

Yeah.

Small enough to fit in glove compartment, backpack, any travel bag or even in your pocket.

And Pocket Fisherman's handle is its own mini tackle box.

Flip up the special Dupont nylon rod and you're ready to fish anytime.

Even catch big ones like this with heavy tests line and your favorite lure and shock absorber.

That's a lot.

Not included.

That is a lot.

Yeah, that is.

No way did you ever put anything.

Okay.

Shane McShane says we used to have Pocket Fishman.

We have evolved into Pocket.

Times have changed.

You stole my joke, Shane.

Because I was going to say from now romco the pocket, but you and.

Shane McShane are on the same page.

Yeah, we're on the same page.

There Fisherman is made with a smooth action Johnson spin casting reel filled with Trilene XL line.

And does it catch fish?

It's the perfect outfit for casting in tight spots.

You can even hang it on your belt.

Expert or amateur will love Popeil's Pocket Fisherman.

It's rod, reel, line, bobber, hook, the whole thing.

Yes, it's fishing fun for the whole family.

And only 19.95.

What a.

All right, so 19.

That was a decent amount of money back then, right?

And I worked to buy this, right.

So I buy it and it's not like Amazon.

It's not.

I work to save my money up.

Yeah.

I saved up two weeks worth of money to get me a pocket fisherman.

It comes in.

I'm so excited.

So me and my buddies, we're going to.

We're gonna go fishing to the creek.

We down the creek and you would catch catfish, perch, you know, carp you would catch.

So get a worm on there, cast a thing out.

We're sitting there and then all of a sudden my bomber goes down and I start and I hooked.

I guess it was anywhere between a four and a five pound catfish.

And I'm reeling in the white thing.

Snapped the fuck off.

All right, now I'm trying to.

Now I'm trying to reel and I'm like trying to put it back on again and it's fighting me and I'm like, I throw it on the ground.

Now I'm hand over, handing this catfish in, right?

Because.

Because like plastic line that, that it's great to pull that through your hands.

Yeah.

And this thing's fighting me and it's.

I'm cutting my fingers, trying to cut this thing, right?

Yeah.

So I, I get this thing, we find, I pull it up, get it up on there.

So then I go.

And I can't fish anymore.

My fishing rods broke.

Meanwhile, my friends, they got their own fishing poles, you know, that they just.

And they're fishing, having a good time, and I'm trying to figure out how to fix this thing.

And then I. I just took the line and I just, you know, cowboy it and threw it out there.

And I'm catching fish like a goddamn Indian.

No good, Nothing to reel in.

I'm just holding it in the hand over hand.

You're simple though.

It worked, right?

No, it didn't work.

I didn't even.

I didn't catch one fish with it.

$20.

So then my dad, I come back, my dad goes, how did your pocket fisherman work?

I said, that sucks.

Piece of crap.

He goes, where is it?

I said, I.

At the end of the day, I just took that thing and I just chucked it into the crick.

I was like, fuck, this thing.

Like a true pissed off fisherman golfer.

You jamingoed it away.

Yeah, this thing.

And then I just put my fishing pole.

The question that I have for you is, as you had it and you're biking to the creek and you're getting all set up and say you're already there.

Were you shit talking your friends?

A little bit.

Like I got.

I thought I was the.

Did you trash talking.

Listen, they're carrying their fishing pole in their hand and me, look at me with the pocket fishermen.

I took it and put it over my handlebars and I'm just riding with this thing and it's like.

In your prison pocket?

Yeah, I'm just sitting there.

That's a good one, Mike.

You got.

You Mike got it with a mouthful.

Oh,.

Yeah.

So I'm sitting there and they're doing their thing, she said, and I, I pull out my hook and my little bobber thing and I think I'm the like, look how cool I am with my Ron Popeil pocket fisherman.

And then John Domingo's response to relaxing obviously seems to involve chucking shit in the water.

Lot.

A lot.

A lot, yes.

All right, so I'll tell you a good.

Who is that poor, that poor floater guy?

Oh, Joe.

Joe.

Yeah, Joe ended up in the water.

Everybody's in the water.

All.

So can I tell you a big boy jamingo story.

Yeah.

Yes, I know I am.

So go ahead.

I.

My family doesn't like buying new.

Matter of fact, I think my real name in Lithuania means buys used and fixes it, right?

So we had this boat that we used to take down the shore and we would fish with it.

And it had.

My dad found it upside down in a field in Pennsylvania somewhere.

He bought it off the guy, he.

Came back and went, I gotta have that, right?

We.

We sanded it down, we painted it.

We painted the inside and everything.

And it had this old motor on it from the 60s, all right?

So this is like 1990 something, all right?

And my dad, 30 plus year old and.

And it was a great little fishing boat and crab and boat for down to Jersey shore.

It was perfect.

It was a nice sized boat.

You could get like four or five people in it.

It was great.

You couldn't water ski off of it, but it was a small motor.

Every time I tried to start that thing without my dad there, right, he would.

It wouldn't start for me.

And I'm like this, you know, you choke it.

You do this.

You.

You push the button, you turn around, you grab it, you pull it tight, and you pull it three times.

And it usually.

Then I'll go.

And once it goes, then you're like, okay.

And then you do it again.

Off it goes like a terrible lawnmower.

Just won't start.

Exactly.

You just yanking yank.

I get into the elevator business.

I'm making pretty good money.

I said, dad, I want to go out and buy a brand new 25 horse Suzuki motor for this.

He says, why would you waste your.

There's nothing wrong with that motor.

Nothing wrong with it.

I'm like, dad, it doesn't.

I have.

I never have a problem starting.

It's you.

You don't know how to start this.

I go, okay, fine.

Okay, fine.

It's me.

I'm an asshole fucking boat.

I can't start it.

If I want to go somewhere and you're not here, I can't get the fucking thing started.

Let me buy the 25 horse Suzuki.

Ah, it's ridiculous.

So I said, okay, fine.

So now it's the middle of the week.

I got the day off.

I get beer, soda, bait, everything.

Got two friends of mine, oh, ready.

To go out and have a good time.

Gonna go down.

We go down, down to the dock, got the boat.

I can't get this fucking thing started.

Oh, I'm sorry.

It also had an electric start.

So I'm sitting there, I'm Trying to start.

It's going, taka taka taka taka taka taka taka taka taka taka taka taka ta.

It won't start.

So you hear that in your sleep, I bet now.

And listen, I was a lot bigger hothead back then than I am now.

Like I would, oh my God, freak the out.

So you didn't just beat the out.

Of it with a hammer, cursing this thing and pulled it.

And I got.

What's it called?

Chokestarter.

I'm spraying it in there.

I finally go, fuck this.

I grab the cooler with the bait, the soda, the beer, the sandwiches, and over my head and heave it out into the middle of the show.

Your friends are like, what the fuck?

I said, fuck this.

So then I go, I'm going home.

So they're like, wait a minute, hold on, calm down.

It was in the.

Yeah, it did.

It ended up in the creek, so.

Well, it was actually the channel.

I said like, let's hold on, calm down.

So then we went and we rented a boat.

We went and rented a boat we didn't have.

I had to go buy you cooler on the way.

No, I had to go because cooler was gone.

It just opened up.

Everything got up and all the shit.

Fell out and it just went down.

I'm sure it floated around somewhere.

Someone got a.

Someone's sitting there driving by the water, bunch of beer.

Here's a brand new cooler.

Look at this.

Here's a cooler.

Look, there's picture a six packs of beer floating around.

I had to buy.

I had to buy a styrofoam cooler.

More beer, more sandwiches.

And we went out and rented a boat.

We rented a boat.

We went out fishing and all.

But I said.

So then I come back and I said to my dad, I said, I am buying a brand new motor for that boat.

He goes, no, you're not.

I said, I'm never using it again.

I said, I can't start the damn thing.

I can't.

So, okay, we take the thing, the boat, we bring it around, we go to put it on the trailer.

I go to pull it up, the trailer snaps in half.

So now the tongue comes off the thing, snaps it.

The boat goes back in the water on the trail.

I'm like, jesus Christ.

So we pull the piece of shit trailer out of there, we throw it in the back of a pickup truck.

Now I gotta go buy a trailer.

So I go to my dad's friend who owns a boat place, and I said, I need a trailer And I said, it's a 16 foot trailer.

And he goes, okay.

So he's walked me around, he showed me all these piece of shit trailers, right?

Old, used piece of shit trailers.

I go.

I said, don't you guys sell new trailers?

He goes, yeah.

I go, why are you showing me this?

He goes, well, I didn't think you would want to buy a new trailer.

I go, why not?

He goes, well, no Buchanan has ever bought anything new from me, you cheap bucks.

So now I said, no, I want a new trailer.

So he goes, oh, oh, okay, come over here.

Oh, you're an easy sell.

Okay?

So he comes over.

I go, how much?

He goes.

He tells me.

I'm like, okay, here's a.

You know, here's my debit card.

And, you know, anything.

And I tow it home.

I tow the trailer home.

Oh, your son's been pissed.

So then my dad's.

He's like, well, you know, we got to get that trailer.

I said, I'm coming down with a trailer.

He goes, where'd you get a trailer?

I said, I borrowed one.

So I take it down, we pack it out.

He goes, oh, this is nice.

And I go, good, it's your trailer.

He goes, what do you mean?

I said, I bought a brand new trailer, and next week I'm getting another motor.

Motor.

And then I forget what happened.

But we ended up not either.

The book.

And I never did put a new motor on it.

But I swear to God, every time we would go somewhere, we'd.

I was back in there.

We were crabbing, getting hit by no seals and those greenhead flies.

Oh, yeah.

And.

And they're fighting the shit out of you.

I can't get it started.

And we had.

Back then, you had CB radio.

So I had to call the house.

Like, I'm calling, and I'm like, hey, can someone come over here and get me?

The neighbor had to come.

I'm such an idiot.

The neighbor had to come all the way back with the boat and tow me back to the dock.

I was so embarrassed.

I'm sitting there on the.

You know, steering it like some douchebag.

Like some.

Right, right.

You're an idiot.

I could get a thing started.

You don't make going out on boats sound appealing at all.

Well, I told you a story about the big pig.

I did.

Yeah.

Yeah, you did.

The big pig.

He wanted me to fix the big pig up.

I said, I'm not fixing this boat up.

I'll sleep on it.

Like, it's like a hotel, right?

And I said, I'll cut an air conditioner side of it.

But I said, and I'm also naming it the Big Pig.

He's like, you are not naming that boat the Big Pig.

Oh, you did?

Yeah, Drug it around.

Oh, my God.

Yeah.

But they were good times.

You know something, as much as I bitch about it, they were most fun times we had down the shore.

We couldn't have.

We didn't have a shower.

It couldn't be easy.

We went and bought 200 foot black hose.

We stretched it all around the.

The where the.

On the ground.

And then like three of us could take a hot shower and everybody else, like one person would take a warm and everybody else got a cold shower.

So you would go to the beach, you'd come back.

We called them Avalon showers.

You'd spray yourself with water, you'd soap yourself up and then you'd spray yourself off and then you'd dry off and go get dressed to go to the bars at night.

We did it all the time.

It was the best.

We hardly spent, you know, it was, it was the best.

I don't know.

The.

That's the time to enjoy it, right?

Yeah.

Is when you can just live like that.

You live like hobos and, and life is great.

Like that's this.

Those are the summers.

Like those are the fun memories.

Then it's like, you know, kids job.

Like you couldn't.

Like you can't do that, right?

Once you get older, like your responsibilities change when you're young and you can still get by on three hours of sleep drinking all night.

You know, like once you can't get past that, that, that makes everything a challenge.

We'd be out at the bars until like in the morning.

Then we would get up, we'd go home.

We'd sleep in the in club shed, which was the shed.

We would sleep in the shed on the floor.

And then we would wake up when the sun came up.

Because my dad was always working on his boat.

He'd be making too much noise.

So we would get up and then we would go down to the beach and we would go down there and sleep until like noon.

On the beach?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

I had friends that did that.

They spend summers.

They would.

You could sleep, I guess, before the cops were really like all over everything.

It's like they would sleep under the boardwalk.

Oh, yeah.

Go out drinking, whatever.

Crash out under the boardwalk or get up or just come back and then hang out, sleep on the beach all day.

I remember doing that.

I remember falling asleep on the beach and not being sunscreened properly.

Oh, no, no.

And I got the worst sunburn I ever got in my life.

It was horrible.

Yeah, you get the blisters and then you get the cold chills.

Yeah, it was the worst.

I couldn't sleep in the bed.

I had to sleep on a couch, on a sheet.

Like anything like that touched me.

I was like, ah.

I still to work.

So I went to work like in very blousy clothes.

Like nothing touched me because I couldn't put a bra on.

I couldn't hook anything on my back.

Like I was just like, ah.

And it was just alternating between like sweaty, hot and freezing.

Like there was no.

It was the.

It was the worst.

I had scar.

Like not.

Maybe not scars.

I think everything faded, but not.

It would blister and then they would pop.

And then the people and your friends would peel you.

They would like big giant pieces.

Gross.

Yeah, like a leper or something.

It was awful.

How do we get to it?

How do we get to this?

Oh, I know boats and sleeping on the beach.

So back to Ron Popeil.

Do you remember old SNL with Dan Aykroyd?

Do you remember like the, the product he would do?

He had like the Bassomatic.

Do you remember that?

I don't, I'm trying to remember.

I don't know if I. Oh my word.

The Bass o matic.

And basically it was a very Ron Pope heel esque commercial.

And it was.

It was basically for a blender, but they called it the Bassomatic because it was so powerful.

And you can see him like blend up this fish.

Every and everything just went brown.

I was just like, oh, Aaron remembers it.

He goes, the super Bassomatic.

Right?

But Dan Aykroyd's doing is like his fast talk and sales pitch voice.

And then he did another one where they were discussing Christmas gifts.

Like the.

That the.

The government was, you know, have the regulations like you can't like sell garbage for kids or whatever.

And one of them was like a bag of glass.

Like a.

Kids love to play with this, you know, and it's that sort of thing.

Oh, yes.

And Aaron did put in.

He goes, now that's a good bass.

Because what he did was he blended it, poured it and drank it.

Oh my God.

Fucking horrifying.

Oh my go.

No, I mean, I think Gil.

I want to say Gilda Radner, like that, that crew, like somebody drank it and.

And was like the whole.

The whole audience is like, probably here's the best.

This was the Showtime Rotisserie barbecue.

This was his best product, honestly.

Now you'll see Ron was here.

He would do like a 30 minute infomercial.

Oh, I would watch these.

So would I watch these.

They were great.

Here we go.

All the work it does.

This machine should sell for over $400.

You know you're not going to spend $400 for it.

Not 375 or 350.

Not 325 or even 300.

Not 275 or 250.

Not 225 or even 200.

Are you kidding me?

You mean I'm going to get this thing for over half off?

Is this.

Where's the ma.

Where's the deal?

What's the deal, Ron?

Yay.

Like you all may be thinking, not 190 or even 180.

What all you spend for this fabulous machine, an over $400 value.

All you spend is just 4 easy monthly payments at 39.95 and look what you get.

But he never said the price.

Yeah, he would never say the price.

Four easy payments and people were like 39.95.

I can spend that.

Yeah, it was $160Y.

Don't tell me how much it is, Ron.

Tell me how much it is a month.

But tell me how I can get a second one for just shipping and handling.

Oh, that's right.

I forgot about that.

Or half off by the was it.

You'd get like bizarre products with it.

Like you can get these handy tongs and oven mitt set for just shipping.

Like it's crazy garbage.

And.

But look at what people are spending today.

Wait, do you still have that commercial up?

Oh, did you already.

You already blitz past it?

Yeah, because he had a catchphrase that he would get the audience to say,.

Wait a minute, I know what it is now.

It's just one.

All right, well, I don't know if you say it.

I'm sure the.

Our.

Our audience knows it.

It didn't have in the commercial.

The commercial was over.

Oh, didn't have that in the commercial.

Oh, that's true.

It was more when he did it like the live info.

There was like a 30.

He would do 30 minute live.

He would cook a chicken.

He would cook.

Well, now they frying ribbon.

Yeah, they have it.

What is it they sell now?

Those like convection ovens.

Greatest stereo sale ever.

Get anything and everything in stereo equipment.

Get it all now during Crazy Eddie's.

Greatest stereo sale ever.

Crazy Eddie.

His prices are insane.

Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

There's Crazy Eddie.

Yeah.

We used to have a guy here in Philadelphia.

His name was George Foreman Grill.

Cass Brothers.

If you didn't get your suit of cash, Brothers, you were robbed or something.

He was screaming.

He would like 10, 15 second commercials on UHF.

He was a.

He was a legend around here.

Let's see.

See this?

The commercials are 28 minutes.

Oh, wait, hold on.

All right, well, hold on.

Wait a minute.

We got one.

We got to do this one.

Hold on.

He had so many products, though.

I got a commercial to go through.

Oh, another damn commercial.

Yeah, hang on.

We'll get it.

For Birkenstocks.

For Birkenstocks commercial.

Birkenstocks.

Stop.

Birkin.

God damn it.

What did I say?

Birkenstocks, not socks.

I know it's not Birkenstocks.

I know it's not.

I know, but I thought you said socks.

No, I didn't the first time.

There you go.

I heard stock the second time.

Birkenstock.

I might have said socks the first time.

I didn't mean to.

I think you did.

All right.

All right, here we go.

All right.

Potato chips don't come from a store.

They're homemade.

Introducing the potato chip machine.

Just put the potato in and spin.

Look how fast and easy it is.

So potatoes in cold water, dry, then fry for just a minute.

Great chips.

The potato chip machine is also a fancy food cutter for carrots, cucumbers, apples, even onions.

The potato chip machine.

A great Christmas gift.

All right, what do we call.

What are these great Christmas gifts?

Right?

What do we think?

How much was the potato chip machine?

Oh, that little spiralizer.

I'm gonna say $19.99.

I'm going $12.95.

Okay, let's see.

See if I'm right.

And it's only 9.98.

Wait, what stores?

Humpty, Tgny.

And Humpty's Discount centers is where you could get these Humpty discount drug centers Gags.

Woolworth, Wilco pennies.

Skags, Wilco Woolworths pennies.

And Eckerd drugs.

Oh, Eckerd drugs.

God, are they out of business?

I think they are, to be honest with you.

Yeah.

So essentially, that's a spiralizer, which I.

You can buy anywhere.

I. I actually bought one of those, too.

For zucchini.

Like, for zucchini.

And it's handheld, so.

Man, that was a pain.

So this lady's, like, just stuck the thing on there and just turned.

Which sounds great.

Until you peel, like, the third.

Till you get to, like, the third potato.

Then you're like, this wouldn't it be nice?

You know, then a bag of chips is worth $4.99.

Because then you're just like, yeah, how many chips are you making?

All right, hold on.

This one here.

Sometimes he would invent something and then it became a big thing.

Like in other words, nobody had it.

He would do it and people would copy it.

And that was this.

Drink a hot cup of coffee on the way to work each morning.

But you can't because ordinary cups fill.

Introducing Autocup by Ronco the amazing.

No spill cup.

Just press the lever and drink release it and it's automatically sealed.

Autocup's carrying strap makes it great for golfers, bikers, skiers, boaters, even truckers.

Autocup by Ronco.

A great Christmas.

All right.

A great Christmas gift.

How much, ladies and gentlemen, would you think a auto cup would be?

$7.99.

$7.99.

Okay, that sounds good.

Let's see.

All right, here we go.

It's Christmas.

Keep the low price point.

That's true.

And it's only 4.99.

4.999.

I love.

I love the thing it says, keeps things hot, keeps things cold.

How would know the difference?

That is brilliant.

I just love how they showed the guy in the beginning drinking from the.

A coffee mug like in the car, you know, years and years ago, a million years ago, when Paul and I were living together, when we first moved in together.

So 1990s, you know, he would drive to work in his five speed and carry coffee with him, but in just a cup.

Right.

So he would drive shift his manual steering, not power steering car.

Right, Manual steering car with a five speed and a coffee mug.

It wasn't coffee all over the place.

Oh, no.

He spilled.

There was.

Car was sticky, but it was.

He would drive for a bit and then put it on the dashboard and drive at like.

It was just crazy.

And then the end of the week we had a million coffee cups, but.

So here you go.

Here's Ronco.

You can still get the signature rotisserie.

Yeah, you can get all that.

You can get your dehydrate.

Look, the Pocket Fisherman.

All right.

I almost want to buy you one again.

Shop.

How much?

Hold on.

It was 19.99 back then.

How much do you think it is now?

You think it's $50.

39.95.

Bet you're still 19.99.

That piece of.

Hold on.

Let's see if it goes.

See what it is.

41.99.

You are on drugs.

I could be on Price is Right.

For that one.

You are on drugs.

Yeah.

You can get your.

It's.

It.

Look, the rotisserie thing was 160 back then.

Now it's 199.

That's still not bad.

I mean, what, 10, 12 years?

There's more.

There's more.

That's what everybody used to scream.

But wait.

But wait, there's more.

It is crazy.

Like, you can get a second.

I'm like, a second.

Who's buying two dehydrators?

Who's buying two?

I guess they're like, well, I could get one for me and my kid.

I love chips and I can't get enough of them.

So an apple and then throw it in there.

Or, hey, I've got 25 pounds of deer jerky that I gotta make up.

I need two dehydrators.

I need to hold on to this.

Yeah.

Now, see, you dehydrate them.

But the problem is, is you didn't have.

You could only put them in what kind of bag if you didn't have.

I don't know if they had zip locks.

So you had to get those plastic bags that you'd have to spin them and then twisty tie them.

And they never stayed airtight.

So if you didn't have a food sealer, you needed a bag sealer.

Remember the food seal, which was also for sale?

Yep.

I don't think he made that one.

I don't think he did because I looked at all the products.

Let me see if there's a food ceiling here.

Dehydrator accessory.

Bob, put this in the comments.

Do you know what this is for?

That's even cut a tin can I had.

I know what that product is.

Yes, I do.

It's the Ginsu knife.

The Ginsu knives, That's right.

Yep.

Cody says I've still never seen this before.

Yeah, this is all before you were born, Cody.

Like in the 90s.

You're just a twinkle.

Yeah.

80S and 90s.

No, no.

70S.

80S and 90s.

70S, 80s and 90s.

Rompopia.

Well, he might.

He might have had some early 2000s.

I bought some.

I still think the.

The Pocket fisherman.

I was 15 years old when I had the Pocket Fisherman.

So that was in 19.

Still for sale.

19, 19, 7.

1976.

Oh, my.

15 Years old.

Well, I mean, he's still selling the dehydrators and the rotisseries.

Yeah.

So.

And those came out literally, I think in the 90s and 2000s, I knew people who had the rotisseries.

You know what the gross thing is, is you Know, they're like, taking it apart and, you know, I'm like, oh,.

You couldn't clean it, right?

Cleaning those things?

Yeah.

I guess you dishwashed them because you weren't washing that by hand.

But I have a air fryer.

Right.

Hello.

That will do.

A rotisserie chicken.

It's got the whole thing to put it in there.

And I.

Right, yeah.

They're $4.99.

There's.

If you go to Walmart, you get a rotisserie chicken for six bucks to buy a chicken.

A whole chicken is like 10.

So I'll just go get the rotisserie.

Chicken from Walmart Costco.

It's.

I think it's $5.

5.99.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You can go get yourself a whole chicken already roasted for 5.99.

You think I'm gonna go buy a chicken and go through all this shit and clean up?

The only thing I have to do is throw out the bag.

Yeah.

It comes in.

It's throughout the bag and whatever.

I don't feel like eating today.

All right, you want to hear something I saw today?

Yeah.

Where they have a thing now where they make chicken in a bag.

So you get your Walmart chicken or your Costco chicken, you take it out of the bag, you take all the meat off, the bones, you take, and you put rice in there, cooked vegetables in there, cheese in there.

The chicken in there in the bag.

You put it right back in the bag with all the juices and all that.

And then you put the chicken in there, and then you add some other stuff, like soy sauce and other stuff, and then you mix it all together and they call it like chicken dinner in a bag.

And then you just take it out and put it over Rice Duchess.

And it's a meal in the bag.

Everything goes in the bag.

It's not even a one Pot meal.

Everything is done in the chicken bag.

I saw it today.

I was ridiculous.

How many times did you watch that?

Like, what?

I watched it all the way through once.

I'm like.

I'm like, hold on.

Maybe I can do this.

Do I want to do this?

Yeah.

No, I have not ordered a Walmart chicken.

They're okay.

That's what happens when you get a Walmart chicken.

The timing was perfect.

That's why they call them the Duke of Drops.

What is that?

I gotta put a mark on it.

Well played, Mike.

Hang on.

Can you just make that as the art is just a screaming chicken.

Oh, my God.

All right, just hit me wrong.

Sorry.

Hit me right.

I guess all right, Duchess, I think it's time to do a Trump tweet.

Here we go.

All righty.

It's time for Trump tweets read by Kate.

Will Trump be happy or irate?

Will it make us laugh or will it be a groaner?

Either way, sparky toaster, we'll have a raging boner.

Have a raging boner.

Iran has agreed to never close the Strait of Hormuz again.

It will no longer be used as a weapon against the world.

President Donald J. Trump.

Trump.

Sweet by Kate.

Was it fire or just fate?

That shop will set it straight.

Trump tweet by Kate.

That was a Trump tweet read by Kate.

Did she jamingo or was it great?

Now the chat decides her fate.

That was a Trump tweet read by Kate.

I like the idea of there were so many screaming.

The screaming chicken in the green dress.

That just, that you have to pull that as a drop or as a, as a clip.

That's definitely a short.

That's a short.

All right, hold on, Duchess.

I'm sorry, but I gotta do something here.

All right?

It's getting too dark in here.

Just talk amongst yourselfers.

Talk amongst ourselves.

Yeah, you got that.

So Cody had said that he had.

He was born in 1989, so he's a youngin and he had never seen Ron Popeil before in his life.

Now Ron Popeil has a website.

It's Ron Popeo.

R O N P O P E I L. Oh, really?

Yeah, he had, there's a biography on him and it's.

See here, I think.

Oh, is it looks like Mo Rocca has a little bit of a discussion on him.

But it's, it would be very interesting.

I would love to see that.

So I, I mean, props to Ron Pope heel for coming up with, like, Very interesting.

You all right?

No, it keeps moving back and forth.

What's going on here?

Never mind.

I'm not touching anything.

I'm literally looking at my own screen.

No, I, I, I unshared my screen and all of a sudden it switched back.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you.

That's okay.

Well, we did step away from Ron Popeil before.

We talked about a couple of just the funnier kind of products.

Like, of course, with the big push for these rotisseries was his selling point.

It was definitely audience participation.

So he would do these live infomercials which you see everywhere, all the time now, and he would get the audience to really get into it.

It was always like these middle aged housewives and their retired husbands or something like that.

So his.

His whole push for the rotisserie machine was you can set it and forget it.

And.

And the audience would go forget it.

And it was.

And he.

Of course, they would chant it through the show at least five or six times and to.

To sell it home, you know, over and over.

And it was.

I mean, anybody who is born pre 1989 would probably have seen this.

This guy at one point, and you could probably walk up to anybody, go, anybody, and go set it and.

And they would be able to fill in the blank because it was that much of a catchphrase.

All right, so here's some of the things he doesn't sell anymore.

The veg o Matic.

The chop o Matic.

The dial o Matic.

The six star 20 piece cutlery set.

The great looking hair formula number nine, which was the GLH9, which was the spray can of black hair.

You look like wooly Willy.

Do you remember wooly Willy?

So if you had a ball spray.

Anybody knows that in the back, if you had the fryer tuck, you would take this and you would spray it.

Did that just switch?

That just switched.

That's Mike.

Mike's doing it now.

Mike's fucking with you.

All right.

Yeah, Mike's fucking fucking with us.

God damn, Mike.

The egg scrambler.

How do you use an inside the egg egg scrambler to shake it?

Right.

Couldn't you just.

I don't know how it did it, but it had like a little wire and you jammed it in there and then it would spin.

Like a little centrifuge.

Yeah, it was spinning there.

And then you would crack an egg and it.

I was like.

It was a stump.

Okay.

So then you had the pocket fishermen where they saw the rhinestone stud set setter.

The miracle broom.

Nice.

The roller measure.

Remember, it was a thing.

And you would roll it and you could measure with it.

It would tell you how long the salad.

They have.

That don't.

Isn't that.

Yeah, they do now.

Yeah.

I told you there was a lot.

Of things for marker, like, to mark out.

Yeah, I've seen like, like businesses and companies use that.

Remember the salad spinner?

You would put your lettuce and wash it and it's.

I have a salad spinner.

I do too.

Yeah.

That's awesome.

It gets all the.

Off your lettuce or your berries or whatever, Right.

The.

The cookie machine, which was the thing that you.

You load all your dough in there and you would hit.

Hit the button and it would like.

Put like a press.

Like a cookie press.

Yeah, it's a cookie press.

Yeah, those are popular.

The Miracle Brush and the London Air Hosiery.

So I guess stockings.

I guess that's for pain boys or something.

Stockings for ladies.

Ladies.

Yeah.

I am curious about that one.

Let's see.

Okay.

London Air.

Oh, you want to eat my cookie.

It was a popular brand of no run nylon pantyhose and thigh high stockings.

Marketed as highly durable and often guaranteed in writing.

They're vintage now.

Seamless stockings.

So.

Well, I can tell you having.

Having had to wear pantyhose for years in other professional realms.

One they would snag.

It was a huge pain in the ass because it's.

Once you have a run, you have to throw it away.

So it was.

You always wanted to make sure you could hang on to your, your, your undergarment, you know, the, the pantyhose or your whatever.

You just wanted to hang on to them.

And it's always so frustrating.

So I hated when they would get a run.

Okay.

But they also made a garter style stockings, which I think are not.

Do people even wear garters anymore?

They do in porno.

Okay.

I don't know if they do now, you know.

Okay.

It's funny you say that because I used to edit a podcast called Fashion Crimes and this one lady still makes thigh high stockings for the everyday wearer.

Because women.

Because with the pantyhose, apparently they make your muff sweat.

From what I understand.

Well, okay.

I could see it.

Yeah.

If everything's all right, just you get.

Your, you get your ass and muff your crack sweat.

So.

So these things would.

You could just wear your regular normal panties and they would stay up.

They're supposedly stay up and they were made for.

Oh, they're thigh highs.

They've got like elastic.

Elastic and like, like rubber grippies that like, would.

And they were also made for bigger gals.

Like bigger gals with your.

You couldn't pull them up.

Sick.

Thick, meaty thighs would.

Well, it's a challenge.

I, I, in the past I had tried those and they didn't work for me.

So.

Yeah, they would roll down like a, like socks.

Like stretchy socks.

Like once the, once you bust the elastic, they just roll down.

So.

And not in a sexy way.

They just kind of, yeah.

Fall down.

It's not like you're unrolling them like nicely.

Yeah.

You get saggy ankles.

And now look, that was the worst.

I'm sorry.

I always wore like them.

They had.

I would wear the the silky ones.

So they had like a sheen to them.

And I loved them, but they're expensive.

You know, in the old days you could buy them in an egg.

Do you remember that?

Legs, legs, legs.

In the plastic.

Yes.

My mom used to get them all the time.

Yeah.

And then we would take.

Mom used to give them to us to play with, like, exactly.

Things.

We just had them in our playroom.

Yeah.

You know what the they were for?

We put in them and.

Yeah.

And then sometimes we would.

At times we would fill them with water and throw them at each other.

That would get us.

We were terrible.

Right.

Oh, so here's a. I just clicked on.

On an ebay listing for a pair of vintage 1960s, 1970s London air beige seamless stockings.

And they are listed for 10.99.

Really?

Really?

That's amazing.

Someone hung on to them.

Yeah.

Here's what happened.

They went to.

Somebody's mother died.

They went in and there's nothing but these stockings in their thing.

And they're like, you know something?

I bet you we could sell these on ebay and make some money with them.

They have marks on them, like, for your feet.

Like, it's.

Let me see if I can find the listing.

We're really talking about stockings this long?

Well, why not?

Because it's.

It's weird to see the, the look of them because the.

When I had them, there was not like nothing delineated for your heel or your toes.

These are actually like tinted dark.

It's very weird.

Anyway, that's fine.

Okay.

This is Fashion Crimes with Duchess.

It is absolutely a fashion crime, but this is also from like the 70s, so, you know.

Okay.

A bit ago.

All right, we gotta talk about what's going on in Iran right now.

Because it's amazing that, first of all, Trump is sitting there.

I wish he would hold off until things are signed.

He can't contain himself because what's going on is the news.

They're rooting for him to lose.

I don't understand it.

I really don't understand it.

Really?

Yeah.

So here is our buddy, Peter Doochy.

Oh, yeah.

What do you mean?

He's.

I think he's a bit of a ball washer with Trump.

Oh, of course.

Peter Doocy.

Peter Doocy, yes.

Yeah, he's a bit of a suck up.

I mean, but, well, whatever.

He asks questions and they get answered.

Okay, so here he is.

They're talking about what happened today with Iran.

And President Trump just got on Air Force One for a quick trip to Arizona for an event that we'll see later on today.

He didn't take any questions, but he just told CBS News he basically explained why it is that he is so confident a deal is about to be closed with the Iranians.

He says that they have agreed to let United States, not troops, just somebody from the United States, go in to Iran with some Iranian officials to collect leftover uranium, what he calls the nuclear dust, and then bring it back somewhere to the United States.

That has been the key to all of this.

The president earlier today disputed a report in axios that the US might unfreeze $20 billion in Iranian money in exchange for getting them to fork over all this uranium.

He says not a dollar will be exchanged in any way.

So we will definitely hear more about this once he gets to Arizona.

But there's a lot happening, and it is possible that he doesn't want to get ahead of his team who are talking directly to Tehran.

All right, how much of or how much Iranian money do we have?

Because we gave him a bunch back.

We still have that much more.

Mike, are you switching us?

Are you doing that on purpose?

Of course he is.

He's fucking giggling over it.

Yeah,.

That is not me.

It's not you.

Who the hell's doing that?

No, I'm not doing that.

Okay, then it's.

Then all of a sudden, it's just moved back for some reason, I guess.

All right, sorry about your luck.

Duchess is on the left.

Jermaine goes on the right.

I don't know what to tell you.

Sorry.

I'm sorry for blaming you, Mike, because that would be something that you would do.

Well, didn't they just say that we're.

Good idea for the future?

But no, it's like when he plays the disc, he plays the Discord thing.

He would play that.

And I'm like, I thought I turned all the notifications off.

And he's over there messing with me.

Yeah.

Dropping the chirps.

So Cody says we have no Iranian money, which had me a little confused until he wrote, it's ours now.

Oh, I get it.

Okay.

Yeah, Well, I mean, 100% again.

I don't know where all of a sudden you get to sit there and take another country's money.

I don't agree with that.

You know, again, in your banking.

I would never put anything in a bank that the US can control ever, ever again.

If they took their.

We confiscated their money and Obama gave them a shitload of it back, and so did Biden.

And then all of a sudden, as if by magic, now they've got a lot of enriched uranium.

Yeah.

To blow our asses up with until we not nuked them, but blew all that shit up.

Steal their money.

You can't steal their money.

I'm sorry, I just don't agree with that.

All right, we don't fund her.

See?

So then.

So Trump, he was tweeting all day today.

I know he's a Truth Truth poster, but.

So here's one that he did today because I'm happy.

Today the news is reporting something, and apparently it's not what he thinks is true.

And he should know he's involved in this.

So here's what they said today.

Do you want to do this or you want me to do it?

I can read it.

Okay.

The failing New York Times, fake news, CNN and others just don't know what to do.

They're desperately looking for a reason to criticize President Donald J. Trump on the Iran situation, but just can't find it.

Why don't they just say at the right time, job well done, Mr. President, and start to gain back their credibility?

I love that he talks about himself as the Donald Trump.

Whatever.

So then he announces, it's not their money.

I don't know enough to know enough.

I don't know if it's not their money.

I don't know how.

If you're freezing their assets, how's it not their money?

Whatever.

There's people smarter at this than me that probably know better.

It's just not me.

So then while this is all going on and Iran says that the stock, the Strait of Hormel, Chile, is open.

I can't call it anything but that.

I know, I know.

NATO and what's his name?

The.

The.

The homo from England.

Their prime minister.

Can't think of his name.

Steiner.

Steiner.

Right.

Okay.

So anyhow, so they are having a meeting with everybody over in Europe.

Keir Starmer.

There we go.

So here's.

Here's what he says.

Thank you very much, Emmanuel.

We just had a very productive meeting bringing together 49 countries around a very simple message and proposition that the world needs the Strait of Hormuz fully open, because that is how we keep prices down for our people and stop the global economic damage.

So we've all agreed.

There was real unity in the meeting that we've just had.

We want to see a return to talks and a lasting agreement, including the reopening of the strait.

We welcome the announcement that was made during our meeting, but we need to make sure that that is both lasting and a workable proposal.

And if anything, it reinforces the need for the work that we've been doing this afternoon.

Because we're very clear that the mission that we're putting together is a defensive mission that comes after a ceasefire.

So, okay, so, blah, blah, blah, hell are you, you great gangly fuck, knuckle twat greasy head, comeback.

Fuck you.

So anyhow, Trump gets.

Gets this and out comes another one.

Now that the hormones straight says, which situation is over.

I received calls from NATO asking if we need some help.

I told them to stay away unless they want to load up their ships with oil.

They were useless when needed.

A paper tiger.

President djt.

So he's basically pretty good there, Domingo,.

He's sitting there basically saying, yeah, way to come to the all.

Everything's done, all right?

Everything's cleaned up.

We did all this.

You sat on your thumbs, you pieces of shit, when I needed you, when I needed help, you would forget that.

I didn't even ask you to do it.

All I asked you to do was allow us to use your airports that we fucking paid for.

Okay?

And we just want to use our bases over there to launch.

And they wouldn't let us use our bases because they were on their land.

So go fuck yourself.

Europe, the European Union and NATO.

You could stick a thumb, one thumb in your mouth and one thumb up in your ass and every five minutes, switch.

Because I will not lift a fucking finger for you fucking assholes.

You guys have been living off of us, sucking off the teeth of the American taxpayer.

And now we need you.

And you're gonna sit there and say you're not gonna help us.

And then when we go in there and do all the dirty work, which, by the way, you bitched at the whole time, all right?

And you called it an illegal war.

And then we clean everything up for you assholes.

And now, now you're gonna.

Now you all got together.

Yeah, you all got together and said, guess what?

We're gonna.

We're gonna come over there and open the street.

You ain't doing shit.

Stay the fuck home.

You're not allowed over here.

This Trump's world now.

Shut the fuck up.

This is the big boys.

You can stay home.

Yeah, we don't need you.

We didn't need you.

Not that you were any help.

And now all of a sudden, oh, we're over here now.

We've decided it's a defensive measure.

And we needed.

Because to keep the cost down.

Hey, you know what?

You faggots said?

We don't need oil.

That you could do all this with fucking wind and solar and all this other fucking fairy dust shit that you think you could just gonna be.

Yeah.

Now all of a sudden you don't have any fucking oil.

You don't have any gas.

And you're over there.

You're over there.

You couldn't pound a pin up your ass with a 15 pound sledgehammer.

Fuck all of you.

Oh my God.

You have crossed the line.

I'm sorry, Duchess, you were gonna say something?

No.

Okay.

I'm good.

You got it.

You covered it.

These people.

The balls on that guy.

Oh.

Have a defensive.

All got together.

What's that?

Orange man.

Bad.

All got together.

We decided, you know, it's a good group effort.

Now that everything's cleaned up, we're going to come in here like heroes, huh?

Great Britain invade the East Coast.

Yeah.

Come on.

Come on.

Go ahead.

You tried it in 1776.

You tried it.

200.

We're celebrating our 250.

Let's really make it a real.

Another round.

Two here.

Yeah.

And we weren't even.

And we didn't even have half the arms you had then.

Imagine us now.

You know how fast.

Look, it took us six weeks to wipe Iran off the fucking map.

How long do you think it's going to take to wipe you guys off the map?

We sold you the weapons.

Please.

I think we could reprogram them.

Just saying they're fucking retarded.

Exactly.

Eric, you know how I sit there and I talk about someone, I can't remember their name?

I think this happens to Trump.

We just did this a couple.

Couple minutes ago.

A couple minutes ago, yeah.

So I think this is what happened with Trump.

Thank you to Pakistan and his great Prime Minister and the Field Marshal.

Two fantastic people.

I can't remember your names, but it's okay.

President Donald J. Trump, the Prime Minister.

What's his name?

And his buddy, the Field Marshal.

Those two fantastic people.

Listen, it's very hard to say their names, you know, most of them.

I can't say their names.

Someone.

Where's the.

Where's the girl, the blonde that can come over here and tell them their names?

I can't do this.

Well, the.

The current Prime Minister of Pakistan is Shabazz Sharif.

And who was the other one?

Field Marshall.

Field Marshall.

Field Peter Marshall.

He was great on Hollywood Squares.

He was one of my favorites.

See, Duchess.

M U N I R. This is.

Why I don't do it.

I can't say the names.

A bunch of Scrabble letters.

Yeah.

Good job.

Guys.

Look, they're great guys.

Very hard names to say.

Lorenzo loves your stuffy English accent.

Says it's spectacular.

Well, thank you.

I appreciate that.

Field Marshal Muhammad Muhammad.

Yeah, Muhammad Muhammad.

But I can't say anything that's family members with those names.

My uncle Muhammad Muhammad was just the other day.

There's a few.

Abbas is in there and all that.

Yeah.

Good times.

Always fun.

Now I'm still having my.

My heart.

My chest pains.

From the beginning.

Yeah.

Like under every once in a while.

Yeah.

Your man.

You'll be all right.

I'll get some.

I'll get after I get done.

Coming, Elizabeth?

Yeah.

Get something to drink and I'll be fine, I guess.

I don't know.

Well, maybe your body's like.

We really needed some old Fashioneds today.

Yeah, maybe I'm going through old fashioned withdrawal.

That's true.

Now, are you doing a Brand X next week?

Yes.

Friday we're gonna be doing all right.

It would have been.

Yeah, it would have been fun if you were able to do it Monday on 4 20.

Oh, no, but that's our day.

We're doing 420.

Yeah, we're doing 420.

Well, you know, good times.

Every basic live stream of this show is Happy hour.

It's 6:30 here.

Of course.

I just finished my wine.

You drink wine?

I don't know why I don't have a cocktail.

I don't know.

I know why.

Because I.

Because you're sober for production.

But you don't need to be because I've seen you do it for completely up for Brand X. Yeah.

You don't clips as much.

It is well enough.

But you don't pull up.

You don't do as much like live things like you guys.

Yeah, I don't talk.

And occasionally you'll look for clips or Deuce will drop something.

Yeah.

Or something like that.

We'll do more sound board stuff than we will do clips because we never know where we're.

I never know where we're gonna go.

I have no idea.

There's no topics.

No.

There's no.

You don't have a board for discussion.

It's just one of those.

You go in, you open it up and just riff.

Yeah.

We don't have a charcuterie board for our show.

No, we don't.

Josh has a question.

He says he hasn't been able to check discord.

Is John's hockey puck leg okay?

Yeah, didn't I go over this or whatever.

All right, so in the beginning.

He may have missed it.

Yeah, I. John's Good.

I had a blood blister.

What I thought was a blood blister.

And the last time it got within a week, I got an infection.

It got real big.

I spent time in the hospital and I had a hockey puck sized wound.

It took four months to heal.

As soon as I saw it today I got a.

Well, it was Wednesday.

I got an appointment for Friday to go there.

And they looked at it and they go, yeah, this isn't a, this isn't a wound, it's just a boo boo.

So they cleaned it up, put a band aid on it and patted me on the head and said, come on back in two weeks.

So here's a lollipop, two weeks for a follow up.

And John's like, thank you, thank you.

Sorry, sorry for wasting your time.

But here's the thing, jellyfish, there's been times where you haven't addressed it and then five days in the hospital, so.

So it's better that you address it and they make you come back for a second visit billing and all that.

So everybody makes their money and it's worth it because then that way you don't have another honky puck in your leg.

Listen, I'm gonna be 65.

I'm a delicate flower now.

You are a princess.

Yeah, I was when, oh, almost told a story I'm not allowed to tell.

Nope, don't, don't.

Nope, nope.

Anyhow, I said, you know, I'm not like I was back in the day.

I can't beat the shit out of you anymore.

So I'll just have to shoot you, you know, I can't fight anymore like I used to.

So, you know, I guess we're just.

Gonna have to shoot you as long as you have a lead in for to get the weapon you need, as long as you're prepared.

Well, Duchess, you know, we have a governor now, Milky Squirrely.

And apparently the only thing she wants to do is hate Trump and protect illegal aliens and fuck New Jerseyans and, you know, don't do anything that she said she was going to do.

So the one thing that she did that she's very proud of is she signed a bill that ICE is not allowed to come in here and work on state lands.

They are not allowed to wear masks.

Basically, she said she wrote and signed a bill that can't be done because she has no authority over federal law.

But she did that because, you know,.

Fuck Trump because it looks good.

Yes.

And finally we had somebody with some sense that basically in the New Jersey assembly had a meltdown.

And it was fucking glorious.

And I would like to play it for you in such a Jersey style.

Here we go.

For the love of God and all that is good.

Can you differentiate between the fact that we don't make laws that control the federal government?

My God, what are we doing?

I'm not a lawyer.

I was an English teacher.

And I comprehend that my fifth grade middle school English students would understand it.

I am coming to you not from a point of ideology, because I know in the minority party we already lost that argument.

You guys are way, way out in the ether with that.

I'm not even hoping to win the ideology.

I'm hoping to win the logical argument to say, why do we keep passing laws that are going to end up in court?

We lose and the taxpayer gets shafted over and over and over.

You cannot vote yes for a law that controls local, county, state.

Oh, oops.

And federal.

No, federal's gotta come off for this to count.

But the only reason is to affect federal agents.

Hello?

Lights on, no one's home.

I'm not an attorney.

I need a freaking honorary degree after going through this for four hours yesterday.

Saying what don't a room full of lawyers understand?

Ludicrous.

Oh, my goodness.

Thank you.

Because they said her time's up and she's like, oh, my God, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Thank you for allowing me my time to be up.

She's not wrong.

No, not wrong.

And she's just.

They're just writing these feel good fuzzy bullshits.

And like she said, it's just going to get overturned in court, but we still got to go to court.

And we get stuck paying for it every time.

Remember, nobody cares about us.

Yeah.

Milky Squirrely was a New Jersey senator or a congressman.

Assemblyman.

I don't even remember.

I don't even know how it was.

She had a congressional seat in New Jersey.

Congress, right?

Yeah.

For state, not for federal.

Yeah, right.

Okay.

So they had a special election in her district, and the person that went to replace her is a Democratic socialist.

And she won by a landslide in her district.

Okay?

And I'm thinking to myself, why didn't we all just.

Since there's no voter id, why didn't we all just go up there, show up and vote for the other person?

Why not?

Yeah, there's only.

Nobody cares.

There's only 1500 people to live in here.

But somehow the opposition got 30,000 votes.

Amazing.

It's amazing.

You know, you know what would stop that?

Voter id, but whatever.

So anyhow, she won and she's a peach.

So what do you.

So here's her acceptance speech.

I would say that the true radicals are Jeff Bezos, Mike Johnson, Calan Tear, Elon Musk, Donald Trump and even Joe McAway.

Radicals who are willing to upend our democracy, subvert our constitution and act with impunity.

And we must stop them.

Are you with me now, you piece shit?

You know what I wanna ask her?

When was her last Amazon order?

Yeah, fucking retard, right?

Or how about this?

She named Jeff Bezos right away.

I bet you she's ordered from Amazon within a week.

I bet you there's packages on that steps right now.

So again, all the people that make that give jobs, you know, but here's my issue with this is what about when Phil Murphy mandated everybody get the jab?

What about when milk, when Phil Murphy shut down all these businesses?

What about when Phil Murphy got rid of our plastic fucking bags and forks and spoons and shit?

What about that?

What about our democracy there?

Do we get a vote on that?

I'm telling you right now, whoever in this state puts up a bill that brings back plastic bags, I'm voting for.

I don't care who it is.

You know this shit.

Why is our electric prices so high?

Because they shut down six fucking generating plants in this.

In this state.

And that's why now electric's through the fucking roof.

And they're bringing in all these data centers which is going to suck it up more, which we're not going to be able to afford it.

And, and the people on the local level are in on it because they're having these secret meetings and you know, and to pass this where people don't get to voice it.

Right now, where I live right now, they're trying to put these data centers in and they can't even.

You can't get a seat in these local township meetings.

Yeah.

Oh my God.

People need to go.

That's why local is important.

You have to pay attention, okay?

Because they sneak this in and if you're not paying attention, you have to read all those little local rag newspapers, these little patches and tap intos or whatever your little local news is.

You have to pay attention.

So you, they email them out like you can get the information for meetings.

They, they, I have them.

They're sent to me every two weeks when we have township meetings, okay?

So I can at least see what's on the agenda.

I decided to do something, okay?

I'm not, because I guess I could.

So you mean anal?

Yes, anal.

So what?

I'm doing is that there is a woman in here and she calls, she has a newsletter that she puts out.

It's called the Woodbury Warbler.

It's about birds or whatever.

You've mentioned her before.

Purple hair.

So she started doing Tiktoks and she's like, here's your five minutes or your five things.

And she does about like a two minute TikTok.

And I said, listen, these would be perfect little podcasts that you could put out and also put in a newsletter where people.

She goes, I don't know nothing about podcasting.

I said, well, good for you.

I do.

Guess what?

Guess what?

I know how to do this.

And she said, yeah, but you know, it's a bootstrap thing and I can't pay people.

And I said, well, guess what?

I'm gonna.

This is your lucky day, lady.

Yeah, I'm gonna donate my time.

So this weekend she's supposed to get a hold of me and I am going to start producing the Woodbury Warblers podcast.

I love it.

When it comes out, I will do it.

And I said to her, I said, you know, you can start with your morning updates until you get ready and then I'm going to, you know, I'll figure out a way to get you whatever you need to start this where you can actually start to interview people and then we'll put this thing together.

Because it is so important now to get this out.

I said, advertise it on Facebook.

I've been wanting to do a local podcast for a while.

I think this is one of the reasons why this shit gets true, because nobody knows about it.

And she does.

And not only is she talking about what's going on at the, at the local levels and she's doing all the air the township meetings in our area, but she's also highlighting all the good stuff around here, like when people have a, you know, I don't know, a yard sale or some kind of things.

Warm, fuzzy.

Warm fuzzy stuff.

Yeah, Nice, you know, frequency.

Nice to have some of those too, because sometimes you hear so much negative, it, it drags people down.

It's.

It's mind numbing.

Right.

When, when you see that some good.

Yeah.

And I, and I think also when you call these people out, you know, they, you can ask them if they want to do an interview and listen absolutely.

For you.

Do a phone interview.

If you want to do a phone in, we got questions for you.

And if you don't, we'll say, well, we try to get a hold of him, but he won't, you know, he does.

Apparently he's too busy to talk to his constituents, so.

Nice.

Yeah.

It's called the Woodbury Warbler.

Is that a link you want to share when you get back again?

I don't know enough to know enough yet.

This is when I tell you this is in the beginning stages.

I haven't talked to her yet, but I know exactly what to do.

And I've already got.

Do you think she's going to reach out?

Do you think she's going to do it?

We've had.

We've emailed back and forth, so we're going to talk this weekend.

I'm going to tell her what we.

What, like in other words, I'm going to tell her what size art we need and then I'm going to say, okay, tell me what you want to do for art.

And if you have art for that, then that'll be the podcast art.

And then, you know, we can do.

We can put the link for the show note.

Show, you know, the show notes in here, or we can also put the link to the newsletter and where they can get in touch and all this stuff.

So we can.

She's a lot younger than me, so I don't think we have to worry about that.

And, well, here's the other thing.

She has purple hair.

So.

She has purple hair.

And one of the things was, they said, I don't think I can listen this.

I don't think I can watch somebody that has purple hair and take them seriously.

A grown woman that has purple hair.

And I'm not going to lie, when I first saw her, I was like one of these.

I did say that.

Judgmental.

Yeah.

Judgy.

A little bit.

So.

But I've seen what she's doing.

I really think that she needs some help.

And I figure that this is one thing that I can do that would help her out.

And then it's all the W towns in this area that she's doing in the Gloucester county area.

So.

Yep, nice.

That's what we're going to do.

And.

Oh, Wobbly wants to know nose ring.

I don't think she has a nose ring.

I don't really remember, to be honest with you.

She might.

I don't know.

But kid kids today, they have that.

Yeah, I don't know how young she is.

I don't know.

Listen, I'm not gonna try to judge how old she is or anything like that.

I don't know.

I don't care.

She.

And.

And people that she knows that are going to these meetings and taking notes and writing stories on this.

This is a perfect opportunity to make a little podcast about it.

Yeah.

Oh, so Aaron has an important question.

Big cans.

I honestly got.

I don't know.

I can't tell it.

She does everything from, like, you know, above the nipple.

Tell her she needs to get a little closer.

Look, I'm not trying.

Listen, you heathens.

I'm trying to do something nice over here.

Don't ruin it.

John's donating his time for a good cause.

Yeah, I listen.

Excellent.

I listened to Ken sit there saying, you got to get great hits.

Geez.

She'll take one look at this podcast and run for the hills.

Rate her 1 to 10 on a stroke O meter.

But I. I don't, you know, be honest with you.

I really haven't paid attention to it.

I have no idea.

I just.

I know she's.

She started doing this, and I figured I could help her and make the thing sound good and professional and.

And we're gonna go from there.

I think that's awesome.

Good for you.

So I'll have more information.

It's important.

And you're gonna help her get her the message out to people who aren't either not listening or not.

She.

They don't see her platform.

So you'll be able to help her, and that could help push her at a.

A little bit more of a higher level within the cat, within your town, within the county, you know, so that's a good thing.

Excellent.

Yep.

Good for you.

God damn.

If that was a lady, boy, I'd really be in trouble right now.

Stop it.

Stop it.

Did you tell her you do another podcast?

No, I.

Listen, I'm not.

Well, you're gonna have the.

Your boomer bunker thing right there.

Yeah.

Apparently I'll have to take it off to take that down.

You'll have to, like, put a black.

Something black over that.

Just.

Well, it's going to be on her.

Not really you.

Right.

So, look, I'm just a producer of the show.

I don't have anything to do with the content.

I'm not part of the, you know,.

She's going to do.

Provide everything.

She's going to provide for.

Yeah.

And help her push it.

Nice.

Probably going to try to get some people to do some read, like voiceovers for community notes and stuff like that.

Or maybe I'll help if you need help with it.

All right.

I'll get a script or something like that where you can read and then send it to me, and then I'll just put it together like a regular old podcast and send it out, see if anybody wants to listen to it instead of, you know, reading it.

They could do one or two things.

They could either read the newsletter, or they can listen to it, or they can, you know, both.

They can do.

Listen to it and use it for reference.

Cody wants to do a voiceover.

Cody and Mike.

Mike wants to do.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, Mike.

Real powerful dicks.

Travis, you know, I just want you to.

I just want to tell you that over in the Cumberland county area, they're having a pickle off.

You get your dill pickles, your sweet and salad pickles, garlic pickles.

Sometimes they get horseradish pickles.

They got a good jalapeno pickle over there.

I'll tell you, Knock your socks off.

No bread and butters, though.

Those are filthy.

They're disgusting.

No, sweet.

Yeah.

Aaron says get Lorenzo to do it.

Cody will listen.

Yes.

Yeah, Cody's a big fanboy.

Well, I would say, since it's.

It's from this area, you could have a fat, lazy South Jersey tongue and do it.

And nobody.

Hey yous.

Go over to Chicantes and get their pizzas.

It's a buy one, get one.

This.

This Tuesday or this Sunday.

This.

Look, this Sunday, there's going to be a craft show over in.

Over there by the Broadway Theater over there in Pittman.

All right?

You can go over there, and they're having free water, ice and soft pretzels.

That Pittman Theater, by the way.

Fuck you.

I'm sorry.

What was that, Duchess?

I was gonna say that Pittman Theater is nice.

Keep New Jersey out of your mouth, you.

Mike wants to know how would we ask Lorenzo.

He's gone.

Yeah, he popped in here earlier.

Lorenzo's around.

He was in.

He was on the morning show today with Bruce.

Mike was on the show.

I know that.

I know he's not in Discord, but we can get.

If I need to get a hold of Lorenzo, I can get a hold of Lorenzo.

We just get Cody to go out and, like, howl at the moon or something.

I think if you say his name three times, he's like Beetlejuice.

He does it.

Lorenzo, Lorenzo, Lorenzo.

And then comment on his podcast.

There you go.

He just put one out.

I haven't listened to it yet.

I don't know if it's the worst of Lorenzo or something like that.

Oh, he's.

Yeah, he's sharing them again.

So you might have heard this one.

But it's funny.

I forgot when he played it, I Started to laugh because I remembered what it was.

All right, Dutchess.

Excellent episodes.

Believe it or not.

We actually do have voicemails.

Wow.

We have very dedicated people who speak for us and we greatly appreciate you.

Thank you.

And it's a Fuck it All Friday, so our schedule's a little wacky.

Right.

And also, we don't care how long this takes.

All right.

Bud Vugger has.

Bud Vugger.

How nice.

He makes me nervous, but here we go.

He's a little bit of a lister.

What was Hitler's favorite planet?

His favorite.

What was Hitler's favorite planet?

I think I know this one.

See if you got it.

Wouldn't it be Jupiter?

Hold on, that question again.

Oh, what was Hitler's favorite planet?

Jupiter.

There we go.

Because of Death planet.

Yesho.

Meal.

Because it was a giant gas planet.

Yes.

Show meals.

Gas planet.

Okay.

Oh, dear.

But stop that.

Stop.

All right, we have.

Dean.

Hey.

Peace.

All white.

Dean, I have a question for you.

What does a Jewish person and a bad joke have in common?

A Jewish person and a bad joke.

It's gonna be a gas reference, I guarantee it.

Like, they both bomb.

I would imagine it's bombing has something to do with bombing.

They both could have been executed better.

Oh, that was better.

That was better than the one I thought of.

Okay.

All right, we're gonna go with.

Karen goes, fuck's sake.

And Budwugger said, oh, we went Jewish this week.

Oh, I don't know.

Here's half black.

Neil.

Let's find out what's going on.

What's up, my jigaboo?

It's half black.

Neo.